Relationships and Marriages

I have had many relationships and I have learned something from each of them. I think I am better because of it and I would make someone a better girlfriend/wife one day. I watch Divorce Court with Judge Mablean Ephraim and yes, they are reruns. The issues are still the same now as they were when the show originally aired a few years ago. Although it is very entertaining, it's very sad. Relationships and marriages are not taken seriously in today's time. That is not a good thing because it creates other issues within relationships and marriages but that's something that my honey is writing about right now so I won't even get into that. I will let him handle that aspect of it. I want to start off talking about sex. Sex, believe it or not, has caused many issues in a relationship. I have seen many episodes of divorce court where the man will stand in court and call his wife, whom I assume he vowed before God he would love and cherish always, a whore or a slut because they slept together on the first date or when they first met. I am sure we all have had that experience with sleeping with someone on the first date. It's not something that was expected, at least not by me, but it happens. I feel it does tend to change how everything else goes. Sometimes that is the last date you have with that person or that will turn into a relationship based on sex. Of course, it may seem like you two are really feeling each other (well, really you are and a lot) but it's all based on lust. This won't apply to every situation because maybe there are couples who genuinely love each other too. However, I feel that is a very small percentage. I feel when you start a relationship with the intention of getting to know the person and befriending the person, it will lead to a better relationship or it will lead to a platonic friend which isn't a bad thing either. I just feel sex complicates things. My favorite couple on divorce court was a couple who met and for like 2 weeks, they had nothing but sex. The man never left her house and she cooked for him and they had more sex. They married shortly afterward. During all this sexing, he never took the time to notice she was pregnant (that was hilarious) because for 2weeks straight, how could you not notice something like that. They ended up in divorce court filing because he was cheating with his ex and she found out he had children. She was pregnant with another man's baby and when she appeared in court, she was pregnant than too but not for her husband. See, she never took the time to find out these things because she was sexing him and she was in lust with him. He didn't volunteer the info either because he felt it was his business. Whatever on that one. They never took the time to get to know one another and when they married, they found everything out and didn't like it. I feel we should play process of elimination early on in this piece. Why wait until you are married. Divorce was not created as an out just because you aren't happy with someone. I feel there should be a valid reason why you aren't but I feel had you taken the time to explore this person and get to know them past their sweet stage, you could decide if that is something you can live forever with or not. I am at the point with the guy I am dating where I have seen his good days and his bad days but I made the decision that up or down, I'm there. There is nothing so bad about him that I can't handle. We all have our ways and we all are flawed. No one is perfect. I am emotional more so during specific times of the month but whatever. He deals with that. He has tried to be there for me during those times and I was able to bounce back but I would prefer he ignore me because my emotional state is hormonal and there is nothing he could say to me that would really make me like him (which I never stopped liking him) but he tries. I have to give credit where credit is due. We have not had physical sex at all and I have known him for almost 6 months or more and we have taken the time to get to know each other. He knows what he doesn't like about me and I assume he has made the decision to stick around because he is still here and chatting with me as we speak. I have also made the decision to stick around because in spite of the ass he can be, most times he is as sweet as can be to me. He has shown me he cares deeply for me and for Hannah (caring for and loving my child is very important) and we worship the same God which is the most important thing of all. I feel any man who has a personal relationship with God and sincere, will do all he can to be the man he should be which is living by, as he always says and reminds me, Ephesians 5. Take the time to read it. I think I will drop this for a little while but I will come back. There are some things I haven't touched on yet but I will. This is only the beginning. I am learning every single day.